My new year's resolution is to stop making so many resolutions.
For as long as I can remember, I've been an avid list keeper. My diary entries as a kid often included several lists that went far beyond the basic "wish" or even "to-do." I had lists for my future careers, ways I would get adopted into the Spice Girls, and how I would use magic to make my Barney stuffed animal come to life. My lists were no joke.
My habits continued into adulthood with the topics of my lists becoming more realistic yet somehow still completely out of reach. If you take a look at my desk at home (please don't, it's a wreck), you'd find lists entitled "Getting Fit" or "Writing A Book" — all of which have not a single item checked off.
But hey, I'm a dreamer, and I think that might be my biggest downfall. In my head I can easily see myself bulldozing my way through every item on my checklist with a big smile and killer shoes. But in real life I find myself doing the same thing over and over again while stuffing my face with brownies and wearing slippers.
Thankfully, I'm not the only one. Just the other day my best friend, Lauren, called me to go over our new years resolutions.
"2016 is going to be OUR year," I screamed into the phone.
"Emily we've been saying that since 2009," she laughed. "Let's be real."
Okay, so maybe I've oversold the dream list for quite some time now — and usually it's quite long (I think my current record is 20 pages). But I can't just abandon it based on the fact that my record for checking items off has been quite low.
Giving up on the list is like giving up on who I wanted to be when I was just a little kid trying to get into the Spice Girls. But there has got to be a way to work towards my goals in a more realistic manner (maybe, like 10 pages?).
I wanted to end this public diary entry with some sort of solution or call to action, but I'm at a loss. Maybe it's choosing 3-5 things that you want to do and leaving the rest to chance. Maybe it's throwing the list out the window and living life in the moment. Maybe it's deleting all the distractions and getting some work done. Or maybe there isn't really an answer.
My goal wasn't to confuse you even further as you sit down to make a rough draft of what 2016 will look like, but rather accept the fact that that's exactly what it is: a draft; a first attempt at writing your next chapter.
This means that as the months go by you can change the scenery, kill off characters (not really though) and turn yourself into the kind of protagonist you always wanted to be. Or villain, I mean, no judgement.
Either way, you have more control than you realize and at the same time no control at all. Accepting that is my first — and hopefully only — resolution for 2016.