I built something and it only fell apart once
If I could make a list of impractical things I would buy if I had unlimited amounts of cash, it would read like this: hot tub hammock, oversized beanbag chair and a bunch of random things from IKEA.
Now I typically store lists of this nature under the file “Never Gonna Happen,” but after stumbling upon what looked like a super easy DIY project, I realized one of those wishes just might come true.
Confidently, I walked into The Home Depot with my list in hand, trying to act like I was one of those weekend DIY-ers that did stuff like this all the time. But after having to ask three employees what aisle the wood screws were in, it was apparent to all that I had nothing to be confident about.
In the midst of gathering my supplies, I enlisted the help of an employee named Abe, who couldn’t understand what exactly I was trying to do until I showed him a picture on my phone. He then gave me a few other things I didn’t know I needed, told me to skip the L-brackets that were on the list, and sent me on my way.
It wasn’t until a minute or so later that I realized he still had my phone in his hand. He hadn’t realized it either.
When I got home (with my phone) I immediately got to work spray painting the wood white — which to everyone rolling their eyes, I now know was a horrible idea. My inability to let anything dry all the way, plus the absurd amount of dirt and dog hair covering the floor of my garage, made for a very shoddy paint job, to say the least. But nonetheless, I kept going.
Lying on the floor, I began to attach the wood screws. With every tightening turn, I saw my vision coming together.
“Wow, this is really working,” I thought to myself — or said out loud to my Rottweiler.
I flipped over the table onto its newly installed wheels, pre- paring myself to feel even more amazed — when the whole thing fell apart. I guess I really did need those L-brackets, Abe.
Now, I know you’re thinking that after that disaster there was no way I could have emotionally recovered enough to do the whole thing over again. But I did. With no spray paint and plenty of L-brackets, I made occasional table No. 2.
And this time, it’s still standing.
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