Slowly but surely, I'm accomplishing all my least favorite chore through my phone.
There are few things I want in life, and one of them is to never do the dishes again.
My least favorite chore was successfully avoided in college when I lived off paper plates and other disposable eating utensils. The lid of a pizza box makes perfectly acceptable plate until you reach the age of 23.
But I realized that it wasn't worth slowly killing Mother Earth just so I didn't have to touch wet food or get pruney dish hands. Back to plates it was.
Because of my distaste for dishes, laundry, making my bed and pretty much anything that makes me a responsible adult, I've always envied people who can delegate those tasks to others. Butlers and maids are luxuries I never thought I'd experience in my lifetime or at least until I married a rich doctor.
Thanks to modern technology, I don't have to wait; there's an app for everything.
An app to pick up your laundry, take you to the airport and even wash your dog. So in theory, I should have all more chores handed out and be a happy, super-spoiled camper right? Well no. Because the majority of these services are only available in big cities — until now.
Last week Instacart announced it would service the areas surrounding Daytona Beach, including your girl's zip code.
Jumping with joy because we were in the middle of a thunderstorm, and the last thing I wanted to do was go buy trash bags, I put in my order for Publix.
From the comfort of my couch, with a cup of joe in hand, I "watched" Anthony pick out my body wash and tomatoes. He scored the aisles up and down looking for Bear's favorite dog treats, and I took a nap. While he panicked because the Clorox wipes were out of stock and he had to replace them with another brand, I went through some emails.
If there's a heaven, I'm pretty sure it's it.
My groceries arrived a solid thirty minutes early, and Anthony brought them right to my door. He had a big smile on his face as shook my hand. Honestly, he looked like he had just had the time of his life.
So before you send me an email calling me lazy and complaining about how my generation doesn't know how to survive on our own (and I'm by no means saying that we do), think about this: if I'm going to be a couch potato, isn't it better if someone at least makes some cash off it?